Storyline - Draft 2

We have decided as a group that the storyline needs developing further, we have decided that the storyline will now go as follows.

1) George doing all of the tricks on his bike around Richmond, photos are taken at the same time and text will overlap saying something about George being a famous BMX biker.

2)Someone putting on some lipstick then a cut to the shadow of her doing this and then she sits down (still filming the shadow) then cut to her rearranging the pictures taken on a table (can only see hands) & creating a message for him such as spelling out his name.

3)George is then in the kitchen, sits down to pour cereal and a note falls out of the box and into the bowl 'turn around.... George turns around to see nothing there, sigh of relief.

4)George is then brushing his teeth, opens the cupboard and there is another note inside.

5)George then moves into his bedroom, putting on shoes, however one is at the other side of the room, goes to pick it up and there is a note stuck to the bottom of it, he ignores, grabs his bag and leaves

6)Goes outside grabs his bmx, finds another note, says 'i c u', freaks out and bikes off fast.

7)Stops at side of road, because he's tired, opens bag and its full of the notes, kicks his bag and leaves it there, bmxing off.

8) Rides through Richmond with the 'gocam' taking the footage of the road and his facial expression.

9) Shot of the bike back wheel spinning, zoom in on back wheel, post it note with a kiss mark on it, and a silhouette going into the background.

10) Text on screen saying something like '1 down 10 more to go'

11) End credits

We feel as though this storyline is an improvement on the first draft however we also feel that more planning would be needed to make it of a professional standard.